Double Trouble – Chapter 11 – A Rough Start

Charlotte

The night was, in fact, rather silent. Unfortunately, so was my muse. I still couldn’t come up with anything better than “Sharlotte,” which was probably the worst secret identity name of all time considering most humans in this world didn’t even know how to read, and it sounded exactly like my real name.

On the bright side, the night air felt cool against my skin, and my tail was free to wiggle about in delight for what felt like the first time in ages. I hadn’t wanted to freak Reckt out with it, at least not on our first night together, so I’d kept it curled around my waist until I got out of the building.

Of course, I couldn’t wiggle it too much, even now. Not when Liz’s valkyries were patrolling like clockwork, their gazes sweeping the rooftops as well as the streets. I was honestly shocked none of them had caught me yet, even with the magic I was using to shield myself… I could only hope my good luck would hold… and maybe suspect that Granny Liz might have put in a setting for them to ignore me and my sister…

I’d have been more confident if I could have used unholy magic to get the job done, but the spell for concealment wasn’t one my parents were willing to give me before I turned 21. They’d entrusted me and Mikaela with a handful of other spells – mostly for the sake of birthday wishes or sensible security measures – but that one was still strictly off limits. Mama apparently wanted me findable by the guards if it came down to it.

Not that she’d imagined guards like these would be among the ones potentially hunting me, or anything. The valkyries were all tall, strong looking women, who each bore just a touch of familiarity to each other. Not enough to be mistaken for one another, but a sort of family resemblance, as if they were all sisters. Being artificial beings of holy magic they weren’t capable of wielding arcane spells, but they were strong, fast, and capable of using holy magic.

Of course, with me drawing upon my unholy magic, they wouldn’t really be able to do anything to me – holy and unholy magic basically slid off one another like water and oil, after all. Still,  it wasn’t like they were really my enemies. More like my competition? I was trying to catch a baddy even faster than they could, after all. Something they might take issue with, seeing as how I wasn’t sure how vigilantes were treated in this town… or in general really. After all, there was only so much I could draw from the comic books I read.

Lucky for me, I’d found a bit of a weakness in their patrol routes. One a clever villain could also theoretically take advantage of! So it wasn’t like I’d just forgotten about the valkyries, and how safe this town was to begin with, or anything. I was just patching up one of their weaknesses while I was here! I could even report the matter to Lissera later, or maybe just go directly to Granny Liz? She could fix the problem easily with a program update, and hit any other locations she had valkyries guarding at the same time…

The problem was pretty simple, after all. It was just a matter of rigidity. The valkyries kept to a tight schedule and from what I’d seen they’d go out of their way to keep it. When one got waylaid by a citizen with questions, they raced to make up for lost time afterwards before returning to their normal pace a couple blocks down. It was an easy to miss problem from a planning angle, but also a pretty obvious one from on the ground. One anyone could take advantage of.

Like, say, the small cloaked figure that was currently trying to pick the backdoor lock to the fanciest inn in town. The same one Mikaela was probably going to demand we move into tomorrow… in which case they could maybe consider my heroics an advanced thank you on my stay? Not that they’d ever know the succubus that had protected them was the same girl as the human adventurer who’d be staying there down the line.

…Hopefully. To be honest, my disguise wasn’t that extensive… or well planned. I’d gotten changed into a pure black dress and was drawing upon my demonic side to turn my eyes pitch black. Summoning my wings in that state gave me the more bat-like wings of a succubus, instead of the angelic wings most of my family was known for. To top it all off, I was using a bit of magic to darken the shadows of my face – most of the time, anyway. One could only cast a single arcane spell at a time, and I was currently more focused on concealing myself by bending light around me. I didn’t actually need light to see, being a being of holy and unholy magic, so it made for a pretty good invisibility spell.

That was enough getting lost in thoughts, though. The figure had already finished picking the inn’s lock, and was slipping inside. All without the notice of the valkyries, who’d be turning the corner any second now. Which… Wow, yeah, it was definitely time for the inner monologue to stop if I wanted to catch up to her.

Shaking my head to dispel the lingering thoughts, I dropped off the edge of the building I’d resided on, flapping my wings at the last second to ensure a graceful touch down. Didn’t wanna crack the flagstones – or draw unwarranted attention. 

Moving quickly from there, I slipped into the building. Thankfully, the cloaked figure hadn’t thought to lock it behind her, because I didn’t know how to pick a lock without magic, and my magic was still focused on invisibility at the moment.

I moved quickly, taking advantage of the well oiled hinges to slip inside and close the door with barely a whisper of sound…. Theoretically. In practice, I closed the door just a touch too hard, making a barely audible click, and just that was enough to have the cloaked figure’s head spinning around. Talk about paranoia… though I guess it wasn’t entirely unreasonable given the fact that they were in the process of robbing the place…

It’s not like they could see me, though, and the door was closed, so it wasn’t long before they were back to business. Whatever that business was. The backdoor had led us into a storage room of sorts, full of potatoes, carrots, and some wrapped packages that looked like they might contain meat or something. I expected the figure to go straight towards the door for the inn proper, but instead they reached for one of the packages and drew it into their cloak, presumably putting it in a bag or something before grabbing another one.

‘Drugs?’ I asked myself. ‘Some sorta supply drop, maybe? The inn could be a front…’ 

Of course, that theory took a bit of a hit when the figure proceeded to grab some potatoes and carrots.

“Are you… just here for food?” I asked, unable to help myself.

The figure jumped, like, a foot in the air, spinning around. As she did, I got my first glimpse under the hood, my eyes seeing straight through the shadows to the face behind. It was a girl. Or more specifically a woman, at least judging by the curves I glimpsed when her cloak parted enough for her to grab a knife and fling it at me.

“Woah!” I called out, grabbing hold of the blade in midair. “Is that how you greet all your potential new friends?”

“Who’s there?!” she demanded, staring at… the knife. Not me, but the blade still floating in midair. Because I was still invisible. 

…For a totally intentional dramatic reveal! Not because I’d forgotten or anything. Nope! Definitely not that!

Either way, though, I made a point of snapping my fingers as I revealed myself, just for that extra bit of showmanship. “Name’s…. Unimportant, right now. The question stands, though. Are you seriously just here to steal food? Because I have better things to do with my time than stop hungry kids from rifling through a rich inn’s storeroom.”

“I’m not a kid!” the girl reflexively snapped back, scowling at me. Which… yeah, maybe not, judging from the little I’d seen of her figure, but…

“You’re tiny. You’re like, what, four feet tall?”

“So?! I’m… none of your business years old!”

“Over eighteen?” I asked, arching an eyebrow.

“Wh-what’s it to you… demon?!” the girl asked, flinching backwards.

“Just curious,” I admitted, shrugging. “Not like I’m planning to pin you down and ravage you or anything. I don’t know what image you’ve got in your head of succubi, but-”

“Succubi?! You’re a succubus?!” she asked, backing up another few steps. I noticed she retreated much faster this time. “H-hold on! You better not be trying to like… steal my virginity, or anything, right? Or tell me I can only go free if I sell it to you, or something?”

“What? No! Succubi don’t even do that shit! We feed off lust, not actual sex, alright?”

“…Sure…” the girl muttered. “Sounds like something a demon out to steal my virginity would say to get me to let my guard down, though…”

“Says the… what even are you, anyway?” I asked, before using magic to grab hold of her cloak and yank it off her.

“H-hey!” she protested, trying to grab ahold of the cloak even as it flew out of reach – which is to say about six feet up, considering the fact that this girl maybe reached four feet in height. Anyway, it’s not like she wasn’t clothed underneath, so I decided to play a little ‘keep away’ and have the cloak stay just barely out of reach while I took my time looking her over.

It seemed my first – no, second? – impression of her was correct, on the whole ‘woman’ thing. This lady  had curves. I’m talking about a genuine shortstack here, with thick thighs, wide hips, and boobs that probably would have shown through her cloak if she wasn’t clearly taking efforts to bind them down a bit. 

“You know, if you want people to see you as an adult you could try not hiding how well developed you are,” I pointed out helpfully, letting the cloak flutter down to her.

She scowled at me, letting me get a better look at her face in the process. Green hair, green eyes, and a sharp snaggle tooth that peeked out from between her lips. All together, it conjured the image of just one thing…

“You aren’t part goblin or anything, are you?”

“You trying to pick a fight!?” she demanded, putting her cloak back on. She left the hood down. “I don’t like it when people leer at me in undercover mode, alright? The whole point of a cloak is to be as unmemorable as possible!”

“Right, because everyone covers their entire body in a cloak…” I rolled my eyes. Not that she could tell, what with the fact that the irises and even whites of my eyes had all turned black for the sake of my succubus form. “Look, just tell me the truth – are you part of some secret underground drug cartel, or are you just stealing food? Because one of those is worth my time and the other very much isn’t.”

“It’s food, alright?!” the girl snapped, stomping her foot in annoyance. “For the orphanage, if you must know! They took care of me when I was younger, and it sucks that they aren’t getting proper funding.”

“They’re not?” I asked, tilting my head. “Have you considered going to the town’s mayor about it?”

“Like she’d do anything,” the unnamed woman scoffed, rolling her eyes. “Too busy chasing girls to care about anyone…”

“The town mayor is a guy, though,” I remarked, carefully keeping my face blank.

“That’s… I mean, uh… he’s too busy chasing women?”

“Nope, you were right the first time. Lissera’s a girl. And a skirt chaser, from what I can tell, which almost makes your story sound true… but uh… this place was a tiny village twenty five years ago, so I’m not sure it’s even had an orphanage long enough to have raised you or whatever.”

“I could have joined late,” she pointed out.

“You could have, but you clearly didn’t, so… I’m gonna ask you one more time. Are you here to cause actual trouble? Because if so, I’ll be taking you in personally.”

“That’s… Would you even believe I’m just here for the food if I told you, at this point?”

“Maybe. Maybe not. You could always try?” I suggested, even as I stepped closer to her.

“I…” the thief seemed to hesitate, for a moment, before… “I’m outta here!”

Something hit me in the back of the head, causing me to turn around. A potato. Except it wasn’t just one potato. It was a lot of potatoes, all falling, as the entire cabinet had apparently been pulled down towards me. Magically, if I had to guess… the girl had some good acting chops, distracting me like that while she worked her spell.

Unfortunately for her, I wasn’t so easy to take down. A quick move on my part had me holding up the shelf, and another spell had all the ingredients moving back onto the shelves – if somewhat haphazardly.

The thief was already out the door, but only just, and I could move fast if I wanted to. Like a blur, I was out the door in a heartbeat, grabbing the thief, tackling her to the ground, and rolling to a stop with me on top of her.

At the feet of a valkyrie.

“…I don’t suppose you’d consider pretending you never saw this?” I asked, smiling weakly at the figure.

The tall, blonde woman stared at me for a moment before nodding her head. “As you command, Princess.”

“Princess?!”

I wanted to curse, and I was tempted to say that things couldn’t get worse, but I’d read enough comic books to know that the latter always made things worse, while the former… Well, let’s just say I was a little concerned that the valkyrie might take ‘fuck me’ as an order.

So, instead, I did the logical thing and muttered something incomprehensible while fighting the urge to just collapse into the dirt.

~~~

Author’s Notes

Many thanks to FallingLeaf, who got this done early since he’s going on a trip.

It’s been pointed out before that Charlotte maybe should have seen this coming, but she was (naively) hoping that Liz had programmed them to ignore her… (Don’t take this as 100% canon, but I suspect that Liz did in fact program them to ignore the twins for the most part… it’s just that she also programmed them to take orders from the twins, and one order sorta overrode the other.)

ETA: Forgot to include the file DX